Ode to Masha The Brave, Scourge of the Freeway

'Twas a dark and stormy night,
And the wind was blowing a gale,
And Masha thought as she drove along:
"What I need now is a happy song,
To take my mind off the hail."

So Masha turned up the volume,
And the music did make her smile,
And Masha thought as she picked up speed:
"Now this is much more like it indeed,
I shall be there in just a while."

But the night, it got darker still,
And the hail, it turned to snow,
So Masha drove faster, her windscreen like plaster,
Her stoney smile calm in the face of disaster,
Her eyes a fiery glow.

The speedo was steady at eighty,
Brave Masha refused to slow down,
"She won't be here for some hours," they said
As Masha approached and bravely sped,
Bullet-like, straight past the town.

'Twas a calm and cloudless day,
And the breeze was whispering low,
And Masha thought as she drove back home:
"On the roads in the land of the free, do I roam,
Let's see how fast I can go!"

The traffic in front was immobile,
But Masha The Brave never cowers,
And she thought of the reverent whispers she'd hear:
"There's Masha who, when in Boston one year,
Drove home to New York in two hours."

The needle swooped over ninety,
To a hundred and twenty, and more,
Masha's smile was seraphic, as she weaved through the traffic,
That waved back to Masha with hand motions graphic,
That modesty made her ignore.

All too soon the journey has ended,
Masha stands by the side of the road,
And thinks on the ticket she holds to remind her,
To be more aware of the traffic behind her:
"You know, I liked it much more when it snowed."

Nik Trevallyn-Jones, 1996.